"Pots, Kettles & Glasshouses"

With our tails still firmly between our legs following last week's dismal performance in the cup, we returned to league duty. Never at our finest on Friday nights and having already fallen to a heavy defeat to Annadale earlier in the season we faced a tough test.

Right from the whistle we were in in control and the game was out realistically out of sight following a Keith Johnson hat-trick in the opening 10 minutes. Annadale did get a goal back, but this was quickly cancelled out by a typical Mark McCullough short corner. Half time and we were 4-1 up (for once not the most dangerous scoreline in hockey) and we wanted to rack up as many goals as we could.

However it was not to be, Annadale decided to play their joker at half time and refused to continue on the frosty pitch. Due to the long list of frost-bitten fixtures, I expect the replay will in fact form part of our warm up for next season. 

Despite the disappointment of not securing the points, there are still positives to be taken. It was a good team performance and Keith Johnsons Hat-trick will not count!

“How do you like them apples!”

In a break from the monotony of the league and frozen pitches we took on Armagh in the Ulster Junior Shield. Having played there just two weeks previously and narrowly losing we were confident that with a bit of effort we could come away with a result.

We were wrong, in arguably our worst performance of the season to date we were 2-0 down within 10 minutes and 4-0 down at half time. It wasn’t as if we didn’t have any possession, indeed we must have had at least 6 short corners. We just couldn’t get things right when it mattered.

Halftime team talk - “4-0 is the most dangerous score in hockey!” especially it turns out when you are losing. Anyway we gathered our thoughts and decided to go out and make a match of it. We did hold our own, we forced more corners and eventually won a stroke, unfortunately the first choice stroker was off the pitch and the responsibility fell to McCullough (Senior) who calmly put it away. Although this just irritated Armagh who went on to score two more goals. We lost 6-1, disappointing in itself, but more disappointing was the fact that we never really got out of first gear and were chasing shadows all afternoon.

The performance may be partially explained by the fact that a white stick was left in the dug-out after the match. Anyway we can concentrate on the league now, with a tough run-in we need to keep our heads up and get some more good results.

Thanks to the Armagh Umpire for umpiring on his own and Cruiser for giving me a lift. To the rest of us, “thanks for coming.” The afternoon got no better, when I got home my wife went out and left me with the kids so instead of watching the rugby, I had to watch “Wizard of Oz” – for the 63^rd time.

“L-O-S-E is just another word I never learned to pronounce”

Due to many of the 2nds attending a book signing by Lord Lucan, the junior club were at full stretch this weekend, with the skipper finally getting his 11^th man at the 11^th hour, we arrived (ridiculously early) in Ballynahinch.

“Welcome to Loyalist Langley Road” read the sign beside the pitch and we were given a warm welcome – the kind of warmth that Captain Cooke would have felt as he was spit-roasted by angry natives. Never at our best on gravel, with only 11 players and with the knowledge that the start time had been put back to allow Ballynahinch’s 1^st XI to get back for the start – we were brimming with confidence. With the exception of Jonny Bell the normal back 4 and most of their obvious replacements were missing in action, this meant Peter Leonard and Scott Guiler had to drop in to defence and also meant the manager had to play out of position (ie. on the pitch). Slightly more normal service was evident in midfield with the experienced O’Callaghan, more experienced Palmer and the Yoda-like McCullough. Upfront were Kennedy, Johnson and Bell. The skipper played in nets.

Right from the whistle Inst dominated possession and territory and looked the more comfortable and it wasn’t long before some good work from Kennedy saw him make space in the circle and slot the ball past the keeper. 1-0 and Inst continued to dominate the early exchanges. Another Inst attack saw a cross from the right wing being missed by attackers and defenders alike, the wily O’Callaghan was on hand to crash home a first time hit. Unfortunately this was to be the turning point in the game, as it seemed to rile the Ballynahinch players, umpires and supporters, but special mention has to go to their No 24 who really took the scoreline to heart. Moments later Richard Palmer was sent off for “raising his hands” albeit to block a headbutt from No 24, the next incident saw Jonny Bell rugby tackled off the pitch and in to hedge (by No 24). Inst held on to their 2-0 lead until half-time.

The half-time talk started with the skipper asking if everyone was happy to continue to be abused for another 35 minutes and we agreed we were. The remainder of the team talk was along the lines of if it doesn’t kill you, it can only make you stronger.

The second half started with Ballynahinch actually playing a bit of hockey, interspersed with No 24 hitting as many people as he could – he even got a green card. More pressure from Ballynahinch and a broken down corner later and they had scored. We than had a spell of prolonged possession but couldn’t take advantage. Another green card for No 24 for hitting Richard Palmer round the ankles (apparently this was a different offence to his previous one) as it was he could have had 4 straight reds. Ballynahinch countered and scored again 2-2. Inst were under siege and number of corners were awarded for “deliberate” feet and stick tackles outside the circle. Just when it looked as though we would hold out for a draw the inevitable happened. We found ourselves high up the pitch, got the ball in to circle and Keith Johnson scored from a ridiculous angle. 3-2 could we hold on, despite the umpires best efforts yes we could.

This will be remembered as the day that 9 Instonians and 2 schoolboys walked on to the pitch, but 11 Instonians walked off. Jonny and Andy well done! An honourable mention must go to Westy, making a rare appearance and not putting a foot wrong.

Not for the first time Shaws Bridge was to entertain a visitor from the East Belfast Constituency, but these visitors were not the respected pillars of the community you're thinking of - they were Cliftonville, our arch rivals from last season. But who would be selling their story to the Sunday papers?